


Speak your mind, Dean

by max_is_bored



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Bisexual Dean Winchester, Bottom Dean Winchester, Destiel - Freeform, Fluff and Angst, M/M, Top Castiel/Bottom Dean Winchester
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-16
Updated: 2021-01-16
Packaged: 2021-03-13 21:21:39
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,424
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28784868
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/max_is_bored/pseuds/max_is_bored
Summary: “I gathered that by the blood rushing to your face. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush Dean.” He said with a smirk.Dean looked away in embarrassment and thought about what to say. He was startled when Cas gently grabbed his chin and made him look back at the man he was speaking to before dropping his hand back to his lap. Dean didn’t think he could blush harder but he was wrong. His face had never been so red.(Or that one where Dean accidentally confesses his love for Cas)
Kudos: 17





	Speak your mind, Dean

**Author's Note:**

> This is my first time writing fanfiction, but my friend thought it was good and told me to post it. So here it is. There will be another chapter with smut but my hand hurts so I am taking a break lol

Dean looked at the man sitting beside him. But Castiel was lost in thought staring at the television not watching the stupid daytime show he had left it on. Sam had gone to help Bobby with a hunt but Dean had stayed behind. He had something he wanted to talk about and Cas was the only person he thought could listen and not think of him as less of a man. But he didn’t know how to bring it up. So he cleared his throat.  
“Cas?”  
Cas turned to him and gave him a questioning look. “Yes Dean?”  
“Can I talk to you about something?” God why did he sound like some emotional teenage girl.  
“Of course Dean, you can always talk to me.”  
He paused a moment to think about how to start this conversation. “I have a question.”  
“Yes?”  
“Is being gay really a sin like they say it is?”  
Cas looked taken aback by the question. “Why do you ask?”  
Dean panicked but tried to look calm. “Just curious, because we know christianity has made some mistakes before.”  
Cas thought for a moment. “Well actually the word homosexual was never in the bible. The phrase they use to preach against it was mistranslated. It was originally saying that man shall not have sexual relations with a boy. It was about pedophillia. Not being gay.”  
Dean calmed at that. “So God doesn’t hate gay people?”  
“No Dean. He made everyone the way they were supposed to be. So if he made people gay why would he hate them for that?”  
“Yeah.”  
“What brought this question to your mind?”  
Dean debated on how to best tell the Angel beside him what was on his mind. He had held onto this information for his whole lifetime. The thoughts he had about other guys. The nights he spent with strange men in hotel rooms across the country while he and Sam were out hunting had been locked away in his mind. He was the only one that knew about them. He decided to be direct but delicate. He couldn’t look Cas in the eyes so he looked down at his hands as he spoke.  
“Because…” He had to word this correctly. “I am attracted to men too. Not just women. I was told my entire childhood that it was wrong and an abomination. The one time my dad caught me staring at another guy he lectured me for days. I love him, he’s my father, but that really messed me up. Maybe more than having to take care of myself and Sam for weeks on my own.”  
He realized he had been oversharing and had stopped himself. Still too nervous to look at the man sitting by his side on the cheap hotel bed. He was afraid he would see disappointment or disgust in his eyes.  
“Okay. I am sorry your father didn’t understand or accept you for the way you are. But that’s how God made you. That’s how you’re supposed to be. It’s okay, you’re not wrong for being attracted to men. I’m sorry you feel that way.” Cas answered with empathy clear in his voice. Dean collected his courage and looked up at the angel. His beautiful blue eyes filled with nothing but compassion. He felt himself tear up at the realization that someone knew and didn’t hate him for it. He looked away again as he felt the first tear roll down his face.  
“Did I say something wrong?” Cas asked, concerned.  
“No Cas. I just wasn’t expecting you to be okay with it. I’ve never told anyone and didn’t know how you would react.”  
“Dean, there’s nothing you could tell me about yourself that would make me care about you any less. Especially not who you’re attracted to.”  
Dean sat in silence for a moment collecting himself. The tears stopped and he wiped at his face. He had something else he wanted to talk about but was afraid it would make Cas uncomfortable. “I..I have something else I want to talk about but I don’t want to make you uncomfortable.”  
“Go ahead Dean. I am sure I’ll be okay. I am centuries old, I have heard more than you probably realize.”  
Dean thought for a moment. “Sometimes I… prefer being with a man because I can let go. I can forget the world and let him take control. It’s like an escape. But I have never been with the same man more than once. I want to be with someone that I can go to, that I trust. Like a boyfriend I guess. Someone that likes me for me and not just a one night stand. Because I have done that my whole life and I am tired of it.”  
Cas let that sink in for a minute. Waiting before he replied.  
“That’s fine, gives me plenty of time to die from embarrassment.” Dean thought.  
But his regret and self loathing were cut short when the angel spoke.  
“That’s understandable. You crave affection and not just lust. Is there someone in your life that you have feelings for? In this way I mean.”  
Dean visibly paled and tried to speak. “I… I mean… I don’t know.” He mentally scolded himself for sounding like a stupid boy talking to his crush.  
“You can tell me Dean. I won’t judge you. You’re human, it's normal to be attracted to people in your life.”  
“The problem is that he’s not human though.” Oh shit, oh shit. What did I just say?  
Cas was silent and Dean slowly looked up at him, meeting his eyes. “I didn’t mean to say that out loud.”  
“I gathered that by the blood rushing to your face. I don’t think I’ve ever seen you blush Dean.” He said with a smirk.  
Dean looked away in embarrassment and thought about what to say. He was startled when Cas gently grabbed his chin and made him look back at the man he was speaking to before dropping his hand back to his lap. Dean didn’t think he could blush harder but he was wrong. His face had never been so red.  
“Then what is he, Dean? If he’s not human. Werewolf? Demon? Angel?”  
At the last word he tensed at the last word. Cas’s people skills may be rusty but he wasn’t blind or stupid. “So he’s an Angel. Is it Gabriel? Or Raphael?” He asked curiously.  
Dean shook his head. He had meant this to be a coming out not a love confession. How did Cas always derail his plans?  
“Well you don’t know that many angels. And meaning he is a male that rules out a few.” Cas said with an odd tone to his voice.  
“Oh no, he’s figured it out. He hates me. I am going to lose my best friend.” Dean panicked internally tensing again and trying to figure out a way to change the situation.  
“So, how long have you felt this way about me?” Cas asked the sly smirk back on his face.  
“I… Cas I’m sorry. I didn’t think this conversation was going to go this way. I never meant for you to know. I..” Cas cut him off by holding up his hand.  
“Dean I am not uncomfortable, just curious. Because I want to know how long we have been hiding our feelings from each other.” He said. Wait, what does he mean?  
“You.. you mean you…” Dean couldn’t bring himself to finish the thought out loud.  
“Yes Dean. I have feelings for you. But I figured that you were straight. And that even if you weren’t I didn’t think you could like me of all beings.”  
Dean’s body relaxed and he felt his eyes tear up again. “How could I not? You’re loyal, caring, compassionate. You’re the most beautiful person I have ever met. Every time I see you my heart speeds up and all I can think about is…” He stopped himself. He needs to work on oversharing.  
Cas looked down then back up directly into his eyes. He brought his hand to Dean’s face to wipe away the tear that had been rolling down his cheek. This time he let his hand stay cupping his chin. “I love you Dean.” The complete honesty in Castiel’s voice made his heart swell. “I love you too Cas.”  
Cas slowly pulled Dean’s face to his, their eyes closing as their lips met. Dean had never felt happier. The world seemed to disappear and all that existed was him and Cas.


End file.
